Sports Cars and Boca Raton

We want to thank-you for the gifts of money, time, donated items, and prayer in completing this adoption and bringing Z home. Thanks.

This adoption has been largely funded by friends, family, and strangers with hearts for orphan care or Down syndrome and we are so grateful for your generosity. In an effort to be transparent about financial matters, I will make up fictitious questions and answer them.

1. Where is the money?

At this point, we have spent $9,587.10 to adopt Baby Z. The money we have collected but haven't spent on the adoption is sitting in an account at a local credit union waiting for withdrawal for adoption expenses. We set up this account a while ago to save money for a future adoption and I have continued to move money in and out of it during our fundraising process. I know that ultimately we will pay for whatever expenses aren't covered but it makes me feel better having this account separate from our household expenses.

2. What will you do if you do not raise the full amount or your expenses exceed what you initially figured?

Thanks for asking. Our plan has always been to commit our savings (and all resources at our disposal) and then borrow the remainder from two people who have generously offered no-interest loans. The donations collected have brought us within range of our savings and I cannot imagine a scenario (okay, I can, but I pray that doesn't happen) where we would have to borrow to finance this adoption.

3. What if you collect more than you spend on your adoption?

This is a great question. If Z's adoption costs $23,000 and we bring in $25,000 in donations, we will put the remainder towards Z's healthcare (this year's individual deductible was $4,000). For the past 6 years (since bringing Anara home) we have reached our max-out-of-pocket for our health insurance. Anara's medical supplies alone cost around $900 per month (our portion is $422 monthly until the max is hit). We have budgeted this cost knowing that it was part of our family expenses when we adopted special needs. We realize that Z will have needs as well. We are not yet sure how his health care will impact us financially yet but we know there will be other therapies and expenses that are not always covered by insurance, Children's Special Medical or Medicaid Disability (if he qualifies for those programs).

Orphan care extends far beyond the orphanage. Often I think of how Anara might benefit from attachment therapy but this isn't in the budget and she is making great strides. We realize that these former orphans will require lifelong care that goes beyond feeding, clothing and loving them. It's likely that Z will be dependent on us for the rest of our lives. We realized the gravity of this before we made our adoption decision and we will put our lives, our finances, our time, and our love into raising our children - both adopted and biological. We are grateful for your generosity and support. Rest assured that neither sports cars nor Boca Raton will come as a result of your donations.

Thanks again for helping us care for orphans.

Surprised by Joy

Joy (6 yrs)

This is our niece, Joy Sa-Rang. Joy provided the inspiration and motivation to bring home Baby Z. When my sister-in-law, Rachel, told me that she had always been drawn to children with Down syndrome and that she had even entertained the idea of adopting a child with Down syndrome, I thought, "That's nice. I am glad somebody is willing to do that." At that time I would have never imagined pursuing the adoption of a child with Down syndrome.

Joy introduced us to Down syndrome (Ds). Joy is Joy. Joy isn't Down syndrome, Joy isn't a stigma, Joy isn't a genetic mutation, Joy isn't an abnormality... Joy is Joy. And Baby Z will be Z.

In the US we abort a high percentage of babies with Down syndrome. The prenatal diagnosis is virtually a death sentence. For the sake of convenience, babies are murdered and families never know the joy they are missing by denying these children their right to life.

My first real interaction with a child who had Ds was in Romania. My friend, Jody, was in love with a baby named Elana. Because Elana had Down syndrome, she received very little attention or stimulation from staff at the baby hospital. Children with Down syndrome were called "half-brains" and marginalized.  In the US, we are much more "humane" - we exterminate them before they are born. In other countries they continue to be discarded and marginalized.

While our motivation to adopt Baby Z is not to make a statement, adopting Baby Z certainly will make a statement. The statement is this, "We value life." Baby Z will be a blessing to our family, our friends, and our community. We are thankful for his sweet life and look forward to bringing him home. We have been "surprised by Joy" (to shamelessly steal from C.S. Lewis).

Joy in Korea

Joy the week she came home (1 year old)

Joy 2 years old

Baby Z is 11 months

11-months-old

Last week Baby Z turned 11-months-old. He is rolling over and is able to sit for short periods of time unassisted. He prefers his foster mom and cries when someone else picks him up. This is a good sign as attachment will transfer. We pray that he is well loved and are hopeful this is the case.

As of last Thursday, we still did not have a caseworker assigned to us for our I800A (I will call again today to check). Pray for a speedy and smooth process.

We are still trying to raise funding. With help from friends and family, we have whittled this number down to $7,151. Thank you so much for your generosity. If you are interested in supporting the adoption financially, there is a Paypal button on the right side of the blog or you can contact us. 

A Sincere Thank You

When we decided to start the process for our second adoption, Amanda and I had intentions of reviving this blog and doing it somewhat like we did with our adoption of Anara.  It took a minute to realize that things are much different than they were 6 years ago.  First of all, four- or five-paragraph blog posts (maybe even with pictures included) have generally given way in social media to one-sentence Facebook status updates and up-to-the-minute Instagram photos.  Most people really don't take the time to read blog posts like they used to.  You get more bang for your buck by posting and making comments on Facebook than you do other mediums right now.  In another 6 years, it will probably be different.

Another thing that's different from 6 years ago is that now we have 4 kids, not just one.  So finding the time to sit down at a computer and type coherent thoughts in a blog post is WAY more difficult.  I rarely even make the time or effort to post things on Facebook.  I happen to be writing this on an evening where Amanda and the kids are not home, and I've promised to use my free time to post to the blog.

Since I have this opportunity, the first thing I want to do is to give a sincere and heartfelt thank you to those of you who have supported us so far in this adoption process.  Whether by simply taking an interest and asking us how the process is going, by praying, or by even financially contributing, we are truly humbled by your care.  I can't say it strongly enough--your support means a LOT to us.  Not everyone is supportive of our adopting a child with Down syndrome, and while we can understand where some people's concerns are coming from, we are encouraged and reassured by those of you who have so generously supported us.

The second thing I wanted to do is to link to and comment on a short video that ESPN (suprisingly?) published last fall called "Perfect."  It's the story of a man who had a daughter born with Down syndrome and how it has affected him.  I like this video for obvious reasons.  Heath White is a runner and perfectionist.  I fancy myself a runner and I've had bouts of perfectionism, and although my actual accomplishments don't match his (except I married a hotter woman), I can still relate to him a bit.  In a subtle way, it also clearly provides support toward embracing and not simply marginalizing or discarding those born with Down syndrome, a group of human beings that today is aborted before birth at a rate of about 90-95%.  It puts a personal, human face on a situation that many people have found themselves in, but may not have dealt with in the same positive way.

I can also relate to the story for a couple other reasons.  When Heath found out his wife Jennifer was pregnant with a child with Down syndrome, he struggled with fear and selfishness.  When Amanda first suggested that we pursue the adoption of a child with Down syndrome, I struggled with doubt and a need to protect some sort of peace or status quo in my household.  "Things are already chaotic enough," I said.  Heath's wife Jennifer was strong through her husband's fear and refused to abort her child she knew had a right to live.  My wife is also strong, and was able to convince me that we are able to do this, and that this boy, Baby Z, needs and deserves the love of a family and the home that we can provide him.

If you haven't seen this video and have 14 minutes (!), please humor me and watch it.  It's a good story and touches on at least one reason why I am excited about adopting Z.  Heath White discovered how having a child with Down syndrome changed him.  Being married to Amanda and having our 4 kids has already changed me, but I openly accept the challenge that this next adoption will entail, and I am praying to be changed and blessed in the same way Heath has been.  Thank you, again, for your support.

$10,691

$10,691 - that is the amount we would like to raise to complete our adoption.

While we have the financial ability to care for another child, we don't have the finances available to complete this adoption without the help of others. Thank you for being a part of this adoption. Thank you for helping us to provide a family and a home for Baby Z. We cannot wait to bring him home and introduce him to everyone.

To those who have contributed, thank you so much.

I am currently in the process of submitting a grant to Show Hope and I am hopeful that they will help offset some of the financial burden. They contributed $3,000 to help us bring Anara home.

Here are the expenses that have yet to be paid.

Plane tickets for 2 people: $3,500.00
Post-placement Reports (x3):                     $900.00
Visa/In-Country Costs:                           $1,500.00
Hotel/Travel Expenses:                           $3,000.00
Country Fee:                                            $300.00
Adoption Finalization:                            $1,491.00

If you would like to contribute you can use the paypal button on the right side or give the money to us directly.  Thanks so much!